shit happens !

Another sunday morning passed by in a hospital :/ never liked hospitals much. liked ? poof.

theres somethin about them.. the strange wistful look in people's eyes and the anticipation, BAD anticipation, rather the fear of it shows on their faces so damn blatantly. i hate it. its like when you're drunk on just 1 mug o beer, you re still in control, you think before you speak. . but after you re high as hell, you lose it. people are closer to knowing everythin that you never wanted em to know if you could help it. and then they can see through you. nothing could be worse than the indiscreet, imbecile, inconsiderate world knowin who you are, and obviously, perfectly misinterpreting it through and through !

hey. i forgot what i was talkin of initially. hell, this always happens to me once i start writing. the shuttling becomes inevitable until i lose the real thought.

but i guess i ll always hate hospitals, the smell of medicines and anti-bacterial wash. . the sickening clean smell. gross. and the umpteen memories of countless trips and nightstays in hospital suites watchin loved ones and family suffer. nothing matches that pain. the feeling of helplessness is so colossal then.

anyway, weasel is much better now. ends loose no more :/ its final term exams from tomorrow, and we havent studied since mornin. last month, through mid terms, monica fell ill and we sat in the hospital all day while they treated her (that one was a sunday too with an exam the next day, and thru the next whole week).

I wonder, if the next set of exams will call for my turn to fall sick. i blacked out today, and cried for him and mum and dad. so stupid, but sometimes i miss home so damn much. and even a single day feels like a heavy boulder when i dont get to see him. .

Life is the weirdest thing i ve ever known. it never ceases to surprise us. it makes us suffer. but then when we dont expect, it turns into this pretty bunch o wildflowers. a sudden volley of colors and happiness. love is most like it. just like wildflowers, we find it in places and times we least expect. . and then it sees us through all the suffering, almost like none of it matters as long as you have your Sire, or your Layla.